Your Daily Ugg

I would like you, the reader, to look at that brown Ugg in the corner of the picture. Now look at where the boot ends. Do you see what appears to be cum drizzle?
"That's pretty disgusting, why wouldn't she wipe that shit off?" you must be thinking. That's what I was thinking. Well actually, my first thought was, "What girl would let a guy bust a load on her $100 suede (albeit ugly as sin) boots?"
And then, it hit me.
OH MY GOD. THIS WHORE WAS WALKING AROUND IN THE MOTHER FUCKING SNOW IN THOSE DAMN THINGS. Fucking salt. Guess what you dumb cunt, salt ruins suede and other assorted skin based materials. Yeah, it does.
For real, at least if you're going to wear the ugly things, take care of them. Or actually, don't. Maybe if people ruin enough pairs of them, people will realize how fucking stupid they are and stop buying them. So by all means, stomp through the storms and slush in your non-weatherproof suede boots. I'll be over here in my adorable Sorels that keep my feet lovely and dry, and don't get stained at the first sign of inclement weather. Okay? Thanks.

Old Guy's Interpretation of What College Students Wear?

So this is an old guy. In one of my discussions. He's sort of your typical going back to college types, very outspoken, opinionated, etc. Except usually, Those People dress like adults. Well this guy appears to be wearing what he thinks college students wear, because the last time I saw someone his age wearing pajama bottoms out in public was...never.
Seriously? Pajama pants? Are you really that desperate to fit in with a generation that dresses more slovenly than the one before it, a generation that walks around in sweatpants and pajamas everywhere? CLASS IT UP.
I should also point out that this guy also has CROC boots on. Which, believe it or not, are just as ugly as regular CROCS. Especially in that color. Ugh this man infuriates me.

Uggs and (so help me God) Leggings

They were cute when the first came into this world. But now that the majority of the population of this world owns them- they are no longer fashionable and they are no longer unique. I'm sorry, but when the majority of the girls on your floor or in your class have the SAME EXACT FUCKING UGLY SHOE WEAR AS YOU- it is no longer acceptable. Also, why the fuck do you stupid dumb cunts wear them when it RAINS or SNOWS? They are not waterproof. They do not protect you from anything. And most importantly: THEY ARE FUCKING UGLY.

I'm assuming that you bitches don't follow fashion that closely, so let me fill you in. This winter season, leather or even patent leather boots are in. From ankle boots to knee highs boots, with or without a heel - they are all very, very fashionable. Believe it or not, these boots are made by more than one company and there are numerous styles. "One for every person," says Ass. This season, you DON'T have to look like every one else on this campus.

Unfortunately, some of you "fashionistas" like to combine the Ugg with the legging. First of all (as previously mentioned), Uggs are hideous and second of all, leggings are NOT, I repeat: NOT pants. I truly, truly, truly do not understand why you people think that it is acceptable and more importantly, fashionable to wear articles of disgusting clothing together. Last time I checked, parading your fucking camel toe around campus only made people barf.

We've got some rules.

1. Uggs are evil. Seriously, Satan's spawn in footwear. They are taking over the world. We see them every single day on this damn campus, and twats just don't seem to realize that they are hideous and unflattering. We don't care if they're oh-so-comfortable, or whatever bullshit reason you wear them.
Everytime you wear Uggs, this puppy cries.









2. LEGGINGS. ARE. NOT. PANTS.




















3. Crocs. For real? When you look at those "shoes" on your feet, do happy thoughts run through your head? Do you think plastic shoes actually look good? REMEMBER JELLIES YOU FUCKFACES?









4. Muffin tops need to go away forever. Buy the next size up! Seriously, no one's going to know if you're wearing an 8 instead of a 6. Or, don't buy those jeans. It's just really not a flattering look. See:


Really? BUY SOME JEANS THAT FIT YOU CUNTS.